2021.09.21 02:53 engelwolfe What to do with anxious cat that messes everywhere?
A few years ago, my husband found a stray kitten under a dumpster after a hurricane. We took him in and named him Gizmo. From the get go, he was very skittish, which was to be expected. I figured he would warm up to us eventually
Boy was I wrong. After a few months, he would hang out near us, but never let us get close. I didn't mind though. I was just happy to give him a safe, loving home and let him have his space. However, in the past 2-3 years, things have taken a major downward spiral. He will find the most secluded, hard to reach places and pees and poops all over it. Then he just sits in it. I'm constantly cleaning up after him and honestly I just don't know what to do anymore. I've tried everything. Feliway diffusers and sprays, put litter boxes in areas where he messes, treats, toys, catnip. I treat every spot with urine destroyer and then clean the spot with a Bissell carpet cleaner.
Even just giving him a monthly topical flea treatment is like high intensity parkour with urine and feces flying everywhere so I can't imagine trying to give him daily anxiety meds. I hate the idea of rehoming him because I don't want someone else to experience this and then toss him out in the street. But I can't do this anymore. He's destroyed so much of our stuff and cost tons of money in damaged carpet, furniture, mattresses, etc. And of course he's in a constant state of panic and anxiety so it's not fair to him either.
Any advice or ideas would be appreciated.
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2021.09.21 02:53 Substantial-Row-6675 Time to Walk Away?
My partner(36m) and I(25F) have been together for just about three years. There is a slight age gap, but we met through mutual friends in a 12 step program, had a lot in common, and just hit it off. At first, it seemed like we wanted the same things. After three years though, I am finding myself compromising more and more.
Originally, we both talked about getting married down the line. Now, he says marriage isn't something that he knows he wants, he wants to be with just me but why should we sign a legal document? (To note, we are looking at buying property together, and the compromise on marriage was creating a will and a trust account and leaving all of the property to me, so he has no issue with signing legal documents, just a marriage certificate. He also suggested I could change my last name if I wanted to, and we could even have a wedding party, just, skip the signing the marriage certificate part.)
He talked about having another child, which I wanted. Both of us each have a child from a previous relationship. Now, he says that he is too old, and does not want to have any more children, and rather than get a vasectomy, would like for me to get my tubes tied (I am 25 and have one child. It's not an option, no surgeon will consider it, and I might want another child in the future. I am not willing to have a permanent procedure, I do not like the pill, and I am not a candidate for an IUD due to health issues, so at the moment not on birth control but working out between the shot and an arm implant).
It feels like the longer we are together, the less our futures seem to be aligning. And he is refusing to budge, and I am expected to be the one compromising everything. I want to say, I do love this man. My child loves spending time with him, his child is a little hesitant of me, because the child is older, and that is fair. But with each passing day, I feel like I am giving up more and more of myself, and what I thought I wanted in my future.
I also want to add, it's not a situation of "propose to me or I'm leaving", but if he is willing to sign MORE legal documents to basically sign over property and money to me when he dies, and to go so far as to have a wedding and change my last name, then refusal to sign a marriage certificate doesn't make the most sense to me. Also, I know that at 25 I am not wasting away from old age, but since he seemingly has changed his mind on what originally we both wanted, reasonably, if I did want to have children, I'm not necessarily getting any younger, and the time I am spending in what is starting to feel like a dead end relationship could be spent getting to meet a partner whose desires line up more with mine. But I am stuck on the thought of - do I just want another child, or do I want a child with my current partner?
I have always been bad at determining the point of when it's best to walk away, but I feel like I am approaching that point. Does it seem out of line? Or is it better to just walk away now then realize in ten years, this definitely isn't what I want for my future.
submitted by Substantial-Row-6675 to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2021.09.21 02:53 veesknees Advice
Currently I am in a very messed up situation. I have 38 students and 2 grade levels. Admin said they would split up the class and find a new teacher. To do this they said they would need to relocate me to another classroom which I agreed with. Now it’s Monday no sub or new teacher to take the other half of students. I’m a hot mess setting up the new class and in between 2 classrooms. I have already spoke up so many times and no real change!! Help what do I do at this point
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2021.09.21 02:53 teresaistired Here's why I haven't been posting (aka what I should've said instead of vanishing off the face of the Earth)
Short answer: I'm on vacation
Long answer: I'm spending two weeks in the area I was essentially conceived in (weird, but when are things NOT weird on this subreddit). Throughout my entire childhood, I was primed to despise this area; that being said, it was incredibly psychologically tolling for me to plan my trip and now, to be on that trip (even if it's eustress and I've probably experienced more healing from any and all of my past traumas here than I ever had before). And the reason why? I'm...honestly not sure. Perhaps it was combined with the general "you should hate yourself, who you are without God/these cult leaders, and everything you've tied yourself to, including the area you were conceived in, because that's where your existence first began." This may sound new-agey, but vilifying the area where my existence first began (as opposed to my birthplace) may, MAY have essentially been the foundation as to these groups shaming me for essentially my existence, the overall thesis being that I ultimately had to submit entirely to a higher power.
So...yeah. I needed to heal. And I'm healing now.
Thank you guys so much for helping me out along the way. Saying that you guys played a role-no matter how tiny it may have been-in supporting me and giving me a group I CAN RELY ON AND IS FULL OF HEALTHY PEOPLE WHAT THE FUCK THAT IS AWESOME I'm still getting used to how great that feeling is when you've grown up in not one, but two cult environments.
Will I be posting as frequently? Maybe.
But I think this trip helped me to reconcile my past, my origins, the root of what I am as opposed to all the bullshit was brought into my upbringing and continually grounding me around the root of who I am, etc. That, obviously, doesn't mean I'm magically and wonderfully healed; it's just a huge, huge step in the process.
Oh by the way it's the national parks in southern Utah (Arches, Canyonlands, Capitol Reef, Bryce Canyon National Park, and Zion National Park, specifically. The Big Five for those of you who may be local to the area).
As you can probably guess after doing some Googling, my parents thought it was a beautiful, remote, deserted, area, and, well...
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2021.09.21 02:53 tturuttatae my dad is so negative all the time
not a fucking day goes by without him being negative about something. he always is angry or complaining about something. i get that your life is hard man but stop taking it out on everyone else.
you dont need to vent about my mom or your financial problems or sex life every day. im tired of hearing about it. if you have such a problem then go to therapy or fix it. and if you cant or dont want to fix it then dont complain. simple. i have my own problems too but i dont make it everyone else’s responsibility griping about it all day.
and its even worse when he belittles me for speaking up. “you dont know how much ive been through” ok? do you want a cookie? you dont know what ive been through either so dont start assuming im just some ignorant child that doesnt know about trauma or “wont understand” whatever youre going through. theres a LOT you dont know about me so dont even go there.
i am not a therapist, i am not your girlfriend, i am your CHILD. stop being so fucking selfish and think about how youre hurting the one person youre staying in the country for.
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2021.09.21 02:53 cdauby0 Funky cloud
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2021.09.21 02:53 m1dnightt just looking for some ideas what to put in the blank spaces
2021.09.21 02:53 bigblazed4444 Being a pro at this profession
Hey i live in texas and im 23 years old. I did not go to college after hs because i had no clue of what type of career i wanted. But after 4 years of dead end retail jobs ive been interested in this choice of profession. My only concern is that im not experienced other than the youtube auto body videos i watch and i also dont have much hands on experience other than working retail. Should i try to find a shop to teach me or go to school for a pre apprentinceship program next year?
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2021.09.21 02:53 PharmGuy14 [WTS] PRI 6.8 SPC AR mags 25 Round (GA)
Got 3 PRI AR 6.8 SPC mags for sale. One is used but in excellent condition, the rest(x2) are still brand new in the bag. Price is $90 shipped for all. 3 Mags left https://imgur.com/a/PbhxCSK
submitted by PharmGuy14 to GunAccessoriesForSale [link] [comments]
2021.09.21 02:53 Aivling Beta blockers and Dental surgery
Hi all! I’m recently diagnosed with POTS, and have been taking atenolol for about a month and a half. I have upcoming dental extractions, and I’m worried about the procedure.
Basically, I’m only having topical anesthesia. I’m not going under, and I’ll probably have some heavy duty pain meds afterward. I’m having 4 teeth removed for orthodontics 😳😳😳.
I’ve read everywhere that only certain beta-blockers can have adverse reactions to anesthesia/ medication, but I’ve confirmed with a couple of nurses that I am good to continue my medication during this entire process.
Have any of you had anesthesia, dental surgery, etc while on a beta blocker? If so, any side effects, anything I should be prepared for, or was it smooth sailing??
submitted by Aivling to POTS [link] [comments]
2021.09.21 02:53 Memory_Elysium OBIS and Bashed Patch question
When making a bashed patch for OBIS, are you supposed to disable OBIS prior to making the bashed patch, and then enabling OBIS?
2021.09.21 02:53 thatjudoguy I unsure about what DLC to get. The ones I'm on the fence about are Sunset Harbor, Campus and Mass Transit. What are the arguments for and against these?
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2021.09.21 02:53 hotkeys132 NTD how long before these disappear?
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2021.09.21 02:53 InsideKangaroo3237 Star Wars Prequels are Bad
Ever since the sequel trilogy has ended it feels like everyone online is praising the hell out of the prequels. I've been hearing so many people say that Hayden Christensen was actually a really good actor and perfect for Anakin and that the prequels did a great job in world building and expanded the Star Wars lore. Due to this praise a few weeks ago I sat down and watched all the prequels again and it was even worse than I could imagine. Hayden Christensen is god awful and yes may be part of that is because of the bad dialogue but I honestly believe that a more talented actor could've played the part of Anakin much better. Also in regards to word building yes there are more planets and the Star Wars universe generally feels much bigger but at the same time none of the locations feel as memorable as the original trilogy hell even the sequel trilogy. Also don't get me started on Jar Jar Binks and the terrible love story between Padme and Anakin. It really annoys me how people all of a sudden consider these films to be masterpieces especially episode three while in reality it is by far the weakest out of the three trilogies we've gotten.
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2021.09.21 02:53 theSarif Can we still post porn?
2021.09.21 02:53 mudderfudden Why do my back wheels tick?
2021.09.21 02:53 Sufficient-Account52 Women of Bumble, what percentage of your matches ask you out?
I once matched with a beautiful woman on Bumble and she quickly gave me her number, saying she hopes I'm actually interested in meeting her. I was curious if this is a common experience for women.
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2021.09.21 02:53 DarkLake They’re riots not protests.
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2021.09.21 02:53 Dolly-Sods-WV A view heading on the road to Dolly Sods Wilderness Monongahela National Forest West Virginia, USA 2021
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2021.09.21 02:53 LeenaPeena It finally happened. Someone please tell me how I got sent a vinyl in the worlds largest box and it still managed to get dented. Thank you so much UO! (Someone please tell me how to fix this)
2021.09.21 02:53 garowedre-68abe4 June on Tim Pool
Apparently she was supposed to be on Timcast IRL tonight, with Alex Jones, but she backed out.
Based on things she's said I would imagine that would probably cause her too much anxiety.
Also Alex Jones is right.
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2021.09.21 02:53 LeRealMeow2U Clickbait articles like this
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2021.09.21 02:53 Papa_Hooty I am watching LuLaRich on prime. Top of the pyramid is all mormons. Has or is Mark Stidham held any "big" callings?
2021.09.21 02:53 armwaypaul No more accurate
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2021.09.21 02:53 Legitimati Nightwave hasn't even started and he's already snapped at the Spergs in chat over his choice of music for the intro.
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